


Everything That's Right

by CalamityK



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, this is literally the first thing i ever wrote please dont judge me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-30
Updated: 2013-12-30
Packaged: 2018-01-06 18:58:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1110393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CalamityK/pseuds/CalamityK
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis was standing in the kitchen watching Harry make breakfast. His mind was reeling. He’d spent the entire night cuddled up to Harry, wide awake, and screaming on the inside. He’d managed to convince himself several times that he hadn’t actually heard it. That Harry hadn’t said “I love you, Lou” and it was all in his imagination. But he knew he’d heard it. He also knew that Harry had no idea he’d said it. Which meant Louis was left to ponder and tortured himself over what exactly it meant. Could Harry possibly have the same feelings as him? Was fate really so kind? No. Fate was never that kind. </p>
<p>----------<br/>OR Louis and Harry are in love but just too stupid to realize.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everything That's Right

**Author's Note:**

> THIS IS THE FIRST THING I EVER WROTE AND IM SORRY FOR POSTING IT
> 
> tommothetease on tumblr

                How do you describe someone you’re in love with? Do you compare them to the sun with all its burning brilliance? Do you compare them to the night, dark, deep, and beautiful as it pulls you in? Do you take their smile, and analyze the way it touches their eyes when they’re truly happy, or do you describe the way _you_ smile when you see _theirs_? Do you tell how their hair is the softest thing to comb your hands through, even though it’s a thick and ungodly mass of brown curls? How do you do it? Do you describe their voice, their scent, and their movements? How do you take every single little thing they do, and every little quirk they have, and put it all into words, to explain how it drives you mad? It’s hard to explain how you can love every inch of person at once. It’s hard to explain that you constantly want to reach out and touch them to make sure they’re real, or how you want to pull them into a never ending kiss every time you hear their voice say your name. It’s especially hard when you _can’t_ do these things, when you _can’t_ voice these thoughts, and you _can’t under any circumstances_ let the other person know you’re in love with them.

            That’s what bothered Louis the most. He had to spend every day with Harry, feeling these feelings, but he could never voice them, nor act upon them. He had to spend every day silently falling more and more in love with someone he could never have. _And it hurt._ It was hurting right now as he stared at Harry. They’d been in the interview for what felt like an eternity. Louis had managed to look dead ahead at a wall almost the entire time, even managing to answer the few fan questions aimed at him without bumbling. _But harry was sitting directly beside him._ Then the interviewer had read off a question aimed at Harry. _How do you describe someone you’re in love with?_ It felt like all the air left Louis lungs and he could no longer take it, he looked over at Harry. Every feeling he’d ever had for the boy attacking him at once, as he waited to hear the boy’s response.

            He watched as Harry ran a hand through his unruly, soft, touchable hair. Louis had to stifle a groan; he wanted to run his hands through Harry’s hair. It wouldn’t be odd normally. They had a really close friendship and were often touchy in interviews, but lately their “friendship” had looked too close, and Louis feared he was becoming obvious. “I…would uh…” He watched as Harry stuttered. The boy was bad with words sometimes, but his voice was like velvet, or satin, or anything soft and warm. Harry turned and looked at Louis. “Help me out here Lou, how would you describe Eleanor?” Louis tried not to wince too visibly, but it felt like he’d been struck with an acid coated whip. _Eleanor._ The girl he was supposed to be head over heels for. She was nice, but Louis felt nothing for her, but Harry didn’t know that. Nobody knew that.

Louis glared at the interviewer and plastered a smile on his face. “Can you repeat the question?” He knew it looked bad, especially since he was certain the camera had once again captured how he openly stared at Harry. It was just easier to pretend he’d missed the question than to stutter over an answer about _Eleanor._

            Much to his dissatisfaction the interviewer actually complied. “How would you describe somebody you love?”  Louis let out a strained laugh and used all his strength not to look straight at Harry.

 The boy was looking at him smiling, and even in Louis’s peripheral it was blindingly perfect. “Well, I would describe how they made me feel. Like…how when you love someone the smallest things they do can just light up your entire world.” _The way Harry lit up his entire world._ He didn’t even bother to make it sound like it was about his _girlfriend_. He hoped that bit would be assumed.

The woman interviewer let out an “Aw, aren’t you a sweet one.” And Harry clapped him on the back making him jump, and then spoke himself. “I couldn’t have said it better. Louis’s the best with words anyway, and you’re right, he is the sweet one.”  Louis couldn’t help it. He beamed at Harry’s praise, but it was short lived as the interviewer finished with “Eleanor’s a lucky girl.”

\----------           

            Even after the interview was over Louis was still fighting himself internally about that one portion. He tried to push it all from his mind, as he rushed off toward their dressing room. He could hear Niall and Zayn chuckling and joking behind him about some innuendo one or the other had managed to slip in during the interview. Louis had missed it of course. _Ergh._ He missed a lot of things when he was thinking about Harry. Which seemed to be all the time lately.

            “Ay Lou! That was a fun interview huh?” Zayn called after him as he entered the door.

“He wouldn’t know, Zayn. He spent almost the whole thing staring at the camera looking constipated.” Niall’s guffaw echoed throughout the tiny room, as they followed him in.

Liam brushing through the door right behind them, “Leave him alone Niall, he’s probably just tired. We were all up late, remember? You insisted we had to take advantage of good hotel cable.”

Niall laughed again. “It’s not my fault it’s usually all crap. I wanted to catch some good shows for once!”

            Louis ignored them and plopped down on the small couch that had been brought in to the center of the room. Zayn and Niall chose to plop down in identical arm chairs, still smiling. Louis wished he could join in their jokes, but he just felt so miserable. His feelings for Harry were eating him up inside. The boy wasn’t even in the room and he was making Louis miserable. Ok, that wasn’t true. Louis was the one making Louis miserable. He highly doubted Harry ever could.

            Right then, his curly head popped around the door frame. “Am I the only one glad that was our last interview for today?” He sauntered straight over to the small couch and plopped down on top of Louis. He stretched out and actually buried his face into Louis chest. “You got off easy Lou, you barely had to answer anything for once.”

Louis brought a hand up and twined a piece of Harry’s hair around his finger. “Shut up, Haz. At least I didn’t shuffle hard questions off on other people.” He smirked teasing.

Harry looked up at him resting his chin on Louis chest, “It wasn’t a fair question, I’m not even in a relationship. At least you had feelings to go off of.” He huffed.  Louis tensed. He did have feelings to go off of, but they weren’t for the person Harry thought they were for. He let go of Harry’s hair and quickly tried to wriggle out from under him.

            Niall spoke up from his chair, “I get lucky, I always get the fun easy questions.”

 Zayn reached over and grabbed on to Niall’s shoe pulling on it, “That’s because everyone thinks you’re fun and easy.”

Niall kicked at Zayn and huffed while the other boys laughed. “At least I care more about my fans than my hair gel.” He threw back.

 Zayn’s face fell into a frown, “Low blow, mate. Low blow.”

            While Harry had been distracted by the other boy’s humor Louis had managed to get up from the couch completely and saunter over to stand beside Liam. He watched Zayn launch himself at Niall and they began a vigorous tickle war that Harry soon joined. Liam sighed, “Sometimes it feels like we’re babysitters doesn’t it, Lou?”

            Louis smiled weakly, “I can’t say much Liam. I’m usually right there with them, and you’re the babysitter.”

            Liam frowned, “Is something wrong? You’ve been acting a bit off recently. It’s like you weren’t really there in our interview today.”

            Louis forcibly widened his smile, “Nah, it’s like you said a bit ago, I’m just tired. Niall and his keeping us up and all. I’m fine.” But he wasn’t fine, he looked over to harry writhing in the pile of boys on the floor. He wasn’t fine at all. _He was in love with Harry fucking Styles._

\----------           

            Harry had noticed Louis’s odd behavior almost as soon as it began. He also noticed how it got worse after the interview last week. It was almost like Louis was mad at him, but he couldn’t for the life of him figure out _why._ He’d went over events in his head trying to remember anything, any little thing, that could’ve made Louis act so distant. He barely even looked at Harry. He wouldn’t sit by Harry when the lads were together, and if Harry tried to sit down and lean in for a friendly cuddle, Lou would make haste darting away. He felt like it had something to do with _Eleanor._ The name made something burn in the pit of his stomach. Eleanor was a lovely, sweet, fit, brilliant girl. She treated Louis right, and Harry assumed that she made him happy. So naturally, Harry hated her. From every hair on her head, to her perfectly manicured toes he despised her entire being. If he was being honest with himself, he probably wouldn’t hate her at all if she didn’t have any attachments to Louis, but she had every attachment to Louis. And that’s what made Harry seethe with jealousy. _No not jealousy?_

            _It wasn’t that they were dating, or was it?_ He didn’t know. He cupped his face in his hands in frustration. Every time he tried to reason out his loathing of Eleanor he just got more confused about his feelings for his best friend. _Friend._ The word made him pause. He and Lou were always close, always playful and rambunctious. Ever since their first meeting, something about the two of them just fit together naturally. That’s why he’d fallen for the older boy. That’s why Louis’s behavior was so odd. He had never avoided Harry before, no matter what he did. That’s how they were; nothing could make Lou stay mad at him, and nothing could keep him away from Lou.

            He plopped down on the couch in their shared flat. Perhaps he’d acted too close to Louis lately, and Eleanor said something. It wouldn’t be the first time. She had once made a gagging noise and told them they were “So gay together sometimes” Louis had brushed it off as a joke at the time, telling El that she wasn’t affecionate enough with her own friends.  It had made Harry burn from head to toe. It was like she had pinpointed every feeling he had for Lou and tossed it in his face. _Gay._ It shouldn’t worry him. It was just a word. He was still human. Just like everyone else. But the word echoed in his head often, and he wondered if it was so obvious. _Maybe Louis had puzzled out that Harry was gay. Maybe he had puzzled out that he was in love with him. Maybe that’s why he suddenly wanted nothing to do with Harry._

            It wasn’t possible. The thought made harry want to burst into tears. He grabbed one of their throw pillows and held it over his face. “Gay, gay, GAY!” Yelling it into the pillow wasn’t making him feel any better about it. He was just so confused.

            “What’s gay?” Harry jumped as Louis’s voice came from the kitchen. _Shit. He hadn’t even heard the door click open._

            “N-nothing. I’ve just got a killer headache, and we’re out of Advil.” He lied, shoving the pillow further down onto his face. _Maybe he could smother himself real quick._ As soon as he had the thought he felt the pillow being pulled away from him. Louis took it and stuffed it underneath him and leaned back on it facing Harry on the other end of the couch.

            “I bought Advil yesterday; you just suck at keeping up with where I put things.”  Louis said propping his feet on Harry’s lap. “Go get some and we can watch a movie or something.” He was smiling. Harry just stared at him blankly. This sounded more like the old Lou. The one he hadn’t seen in over a week. The bright, happy, cheery, cuddly Lou that he loved. _Maybe Harry had just been imagining things._

\----------

            Louis couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t avoid Harry another second. It was like he was torturing himself. _And for what?_ Harry didn’t seem happy about it either. Niall had told him that the younger lad was constantly asking the other boys what he’d done to make Louis mad at him. _Louis felt like an absolute ignorant fool._ By avoiding the man he loved, he was worrying the man he loved, which in turn worried him even more. It was a vicious cycle.

            So in the car ride back to his flat he decided he was going to set everything back to normal, or at least as normal as he could make it. He just didn’t expect to pop in on Harry yelling “Gay” into a pillow. For a second Louis had blanched and turned completely white. Then shot to the kitchen. _Oh no, it’s all over. He knows. Harry knows._ His mind had raced frantically and a ball of tension formed in his stomach. Quickly he turned toward the living room and tried to sound innocent. “What’s gay?”

            When Harry had said he was yelling at his headache, Louis thought he was going to faint from relief. Remembering his recent panic made him chuckle nervously, which made Harry shift in his sleep on the other end of the couch. They’d settled on watching some old DVD that had been buried in their stack. Louis hadn’t paid attention to the name. He just knew it was something Harry would love so he’d popped it in and returned to the couch.

            He looked over at his sleeping flat mate. He’d managed to last halfway the movie before he’d conked out. Louis just turned it off in favor of watching him sleep. _He was just so adorable._ His mouth hanging slightly open and one arm slung off the couch. Even his drooling down his chin was kind of cute. Louis wanted to crawl over and snuggle into him and go to sleep himself, but he was still afraid. Sure, they’d slept like that before. They used to fall asleep like that at Niall’s place and during naps on tour. But something was still holding him back.

            Harry shifted again and opened an eye. “Lou, I’m cold.”

            Louis looked over at him, “You should go to bed Haz.” Harry was still so sleepy and his sleepy voice made Louis shiver.

            “No, Lou. Too tired. Snuggle.” He droned it out groggily and slung his arms open motioning for Louis to crawl up to him. Louis’s heart almost skipped a beat but he never hesitated as he darted forward and curled onto Harry’s chest, placing his head in the crook of his neck. It felt good. It felt _right._ Harry let his arm drop onto Louis’s back and squeezed him closer. Louis shifted his head to look up at him, he was just so blasted beautiful when he slept. “Lou?”  
           

            “Yeah Haz?” Louis wondered how Harry could possibly still be talking. He was already pretty much asleep again.

            “I love you, Lou.” Harry said it at an almost inaudible level right as he fell completely into sleep. _Louis’s heart stopped._

\----------

            Louis was standing in the kitchen watching Harry make breakfast. His mind was reeling. He’d spent the entire night cuddled up to Harry, wide awake, and screaming on the inside. He’d managed to convince himself several times that he hadn’t actually heard it. That Harry hadn’t said “ _I love you, Lou”_ and it was all in his imagination. But he knew he’d heard it. He also knew that Harry had no idea he’d said it. Which meant Louis was left to ponder and tortured himself over what exactly it meant. _Could Harry possibly have the same feelings as him? Was fate really so kind?_ No. Fate was never that kind.

            “Are you alright?” Harry asked flashing his perfect, brilliant smile and placing a plate of eggs in front of him. “You look like you’ve been out all night clubbing, and I know that’s not the case.”

            Louis ran a hand through his rumpled hair. It was sticking up at all angles, and he could feel the bags under his eyes. _But who could’ve slept after hearing that._ “Hah! It’s your fault I didn’t sleep well. You’re like lying beside an oven.” Both of those things were very true, but Harry’s warmth didn’t bother Louis. It didn’t bother Louis at all. As a matter of fact he wanted to spend the rest of his life encased in Harry’s warmth. The thought made him groan.

            Harry chuckled mistaking his groan for lack of sleep frustrations. “At least I didn’t talk in my sleep.”

            Louis jumped slightly, and an idea formed in his head. _A bad idea._ “Oh, but you did, Haz. You definitely talked in your sleep.” He didn’t know where he was trying to go with this. But he saw the younger boy grow suddenly nervous.

            “Oh, yeah then? What did I say? Was I yelling at Niall again like I did last time.” Harry’s eyes looked uncharacteristically worried, and slightly hopeful.

             Before Louis even realized what he said he blurted it out, “You told me you loved me.”

            Harry dropped his plate and his eggs went sliding onto the floor. He immediately jumped down and was scrambling to clean up his mess. Louis was holding his breath. _Oh no, what did he just do. Why did he say it? Why did he bring up? Stupid, stupid, stupid._ Harry brought the mess up to the counter and looked directly into Louis eyes. “That was a bad joke, Lou. You made me drop my breakfast.” Louis’s heart sank and he looked blankly down at his plate. _So it had just been Harry rambling in his sleep._

            Louis was about to try a laugh, and tell Harry “Yeah it was just a joke” when he saw that Harry hadn’t moved. _At all._ He was still braced on the kitchen island directly across from Louis. Just staring at him. Louis felt like his gaze was burning him, but Louis always felt like Harry’s gaze burned him. Harry’s eyes were shining with something this time though. It wasn’t anger. He didn’t know what it was. It made heat rise in Louis’s stomach and, and he quickly tried to stammer out an apology under Harry’s burning gaze.

            “I-I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you drop your food.” He jumped up breaking eye contact before he made a fool of himself, and dashed around the island toward the stove. Standing behind Harry with his back facing him meant he didn’t have to look at Harry, and didn’t have to worry about blurting out his own feelings in this mad panic of a morning. “I’ll…I’ll just make you some more food. It…It was a joke.” He yammered and grabbed at a frying pan trying to place it on the stove when Harry’s hand came down on his arm stopping him. He turned slowly, breath caught in his throat. _This morning was going so bad. He’d somehow made Harry mad. No. No—_ His thoughts stopped as Harry’s mouth came down on his quite unexpectedly. All the breath he had left him, as his lips met Harry’s in a confused, passionate tangle. It was like every dream he’d ever had about it, only better, and he felt weak as he tried to process the shock of it. _Crash._ He dropped the damned frying pan _._

The noise jolted both of the boys back into sanity and they pulled apart. Much to Louis’s dismay. _Had he really just been kissed by Harry fucking Styles?_

 ----------

            Harry looked down at Louis slightly mortified. _What the hell did he just let himself do?_ He jerked back and slammed into the island. “I….Lou….Oh my God.  I’m so sorry. I...I I didn’t mean to- I.” He stammered around trying to make sense and failing miserably. Louis was just staring at him. The hand that previously held the frying pan still raised like he was holding it. “Oh god, Lou. Fuck. Shit, shit. I’m sorry. I knew better. I knew better. Dammit.” He groped the counter top behind him to keep himself upright. He’d made a right proper mess this time. He didn’t know how to talk himself out of it. “Lou, I mean... I know you’re not...You’re with Eleanor….I just…Dammit…Dam—

             Louis’s mouth cut him off mid-sentence. He was glad he’d been braced because the older, but smaller lad had flung himself at him full force. Harry couldn’t breathe. _Louis was kissing him now._ He knew he’d just kissed Louis, but he was expecting rejection. Not… _Not this._ He had been expecting every fear he’d ever had about his feeling for Louis to be slammed down on him at once. Instead,Louis’s mouth was pushing hard against his own and it felt like Louis was physically trying to climb him. Without even thinking he grabbed Louis’s legs and hoisted them up around his waist. Turning around so Louis was sitting on the island top. _What were they doing?_ The thought made Harry break the kiss once more, and Louis’s mouth tried to follow his as he shot back, he never loosened his grip on Louis’s legs though.

            “Why…Why’d you stop?” Louis’s face was flush and his lips were already getting red. The older boy looked more confused and flustered than Harry had ever seen him. Harry looked at him. This was the man he’s been in love with for so long. This was the man he’d wanted to hold and kiss, and love. _Was this really happening?_ “Harry? Haz.” Louis was looking at him just as dazed and confused looking as he felt. Without thinking he pressed his forehead down to Lou’s, and began confessing like some mad catholic boy.

            “I meant it. I didn’t know I’d said it out loud. I was too tired, but I meant it Lou. _I love you, Lou._ I’ve been trying to hide it for so long. I don’t know what came over me. I just…I just love you so fucking much, Lou. With every fiber of my being, and when you avoided me I felt like I was coming apart. I thought you’d figured out how I felt; I thought you were rejecting me. _”_   Harry felt a tear slide down his cheek. He hadn’t even realized he was crying. It just felt like such a relief to finally say it. He’d bottled it up for so long, and when Louis was avoiding him he felt like he was going to burst. But here was Lou, right in front of him. Clutching onto his arms and kissing his nose.

            “ _I love you too, Haz.”_ It came out in a breathy whisper, causing Harry to press his forehead tighter against Louis’s for fear this wasn’t real. “I didn’t think you’d ever feel that way. That’s why I was avoiding you. I…I thought my feelings were becoming too obvious.” Louis was talking fast, and wiping Harry’s tears from his eyes. “I just…I love you so much it’s not normal Harry. I’ve always felt this way about you. Never in a million years did I think I’d ever be sitting here telling you, but I am. And I do. I love you. I love you so much it felt like my soul was wrenching out of me during that interview. When you asked me to describe _Eleanor._ I could never describe her with love. Only you Harry, I’ve only ever been able to love you. This is everything that’s right.”

Just like that Harry was kissing him again. He never wanted to stop kissing him, because Louis was the sun and warmth and everything he’d ever wanted, and even if this was only going to last for a moment, _this moment,_ was both of them finally colliding into a passionate mess that was nothing but pure love. This moment was finally theirs, _and this moment was right._

**Author's Note:**

> eesh that was bad wasn't it?


End file.
